Stages of Healing

It's been over 6 years since I had my knee replaced with a titanium one. I still have my own knee cap, but they put a 'new' backing on it. I can still remember the pain but not as vividly. I'm very thankful that I can walk without pain now; though I may not be able to do the things I loved to do. I have mourned them, sometimes with tears.

Before the surgery I would hike a lot, not long hikes, lots of short ones. My favorite place was Glen Helen nature reserve. I really liked hiking there in the snow. Seeing the deer on the frozen water; following their path, being close enough to hear their breathing. In the warm weather I could jump across the stream on the rocks that were stepping stones. I could go along the narrow paths and climb up the steps to the nature center. I would take my three grandsons for hikes with me too. I loved those times. We would create our own GORP. I had backpacks and hiking sticks for them and we would go for a wonderful afternoon hike. I really miss those times. I also walked for exericise and of course rode my bike 13 miles a day. I would ride 25 to 30 miles on the weekends. When we were looking for homes I even found a place that was right on the bike path. I wanted to move there so it would be easier for me to jump on the path; no more toting the bike in my car.

After surgery I never have gotten my range of motion back. It should be at least 120°; I'm only at 90° and sometimes as good as 100°. Because of that loss I was unable to ride my Cannondale®. I cried. I gave up buying the home in the biking community and we bought a new one without thoughts of cycling again. A couple of years later I talked to my surgeon and he said it may take me 3 or 4 years but I would eventually be able to ride again. I had so much damage from the original accident and he had to do a lot of repair work. I had hope once again.

One weekend I was railfanning and met two older couples; they showed me their bikes. They told me how they were different and I may be able to ride one even with my shortened range of motion. I could not wait to get back home and look for an Electra Townie®. I went online, read about them and picked out one I liked. I went to the bike shop with a friend to help me in case I found it. At the bike shop I saw exactly the one I had chosen on the internet and it was on sale for over a $50 savings. I tried it in the parking lot; I could ride a bike again. I bought it right then and there. I cried all the way home because of happiness. I had a bike I could ride.

Sometimes I wish we had moved to the bike path community now that I can ride again; but at least I can ride in my neighborhood. I have a carrier for my bike and take it to the path and that can be fun too. I don't ride the long treks I used though.

Healing takes time and it comes in different stages. Once I thought I had lost so much that I enjoyed doing. It's back but modified, I can accept that. I love life!